Over the Christmas holidays, we got to see a couple of movies. I already told you about how much I enjoyed The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, but was equally touched by Saving Mr. Banks. 
The movie has, I think, many levels of focus. Its not exactly a funny movie, or even “light-hearted,” but there’s a lot there about life. Here’s the part that really grabbed me. Throughout the movie, the character of Travers, played marvelously by Emma Thompson, battles with Disney. She simply is not all that interested in what he wants to do with her story; while many would be entranced that someone as powerful as Disney wanted to use your story, Travers was not. So, at almost every turn, she opposes him and acts, well both weird and rude. After one memorable scene, a gentleman sitting behind us muttered “what a jerk” after yet another incident.
As I sat there, I silently agreed with the man….she was being so rude. However, you could tell by the way the movie was edited that there was “more to the story.” And sure enough, as the movie rolled along, more of her backstory was revealed. Much of her onerous actions became more clear. Soon, she was sympathetic in our eyes.
As I walked out of the theater, I was really grabbed by this thought—all of us, everyone, is a person with a back story. Each person whose path you cross has more going on than you can even imagine. And certainly more than you know. Even the person you know the best, a person whom you have been friends with for years or even married….that person you do not know. They have a story behind their facade that makes them special, amazing, incredible. C.S. Lewis touched on this in his wonderful work, The Weight of Glory.
“It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which,if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree helping each other to one or the other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all of our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations — these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit — immortal horrors or everlasting splendors.”
Here’s where this really touches you and me. Think about the interactions you had today. Did you find yourself frustrated with someone through an action? I did (a guy pulled out in front of me). Did you get curious why a friend or colleague was sad today, or seemed especially content? Have any really negative interactions? In those moments, when you are ready to judge the other, upset with their actions or what they said, remember that everyone has context, a backstory that is hidden to you. You simply don’t know what they are going through, what has transpired in their life to this point.
Be patient. Show grace. Cut them a little slack. This person is extraordinary. Give them a chance to show you.